Today's update is courtesy of the Fashion File, airing on CBC Television, Wednesdays at 2:30pm.
Every so often I like to watch this show, so this edition seemed like a decent idea. While I do enjoy the decadence of seeing what's out there on the market, some little "issues" did arise while watching the ladies of the runway.
One, hair. What is with every bloody model having long hair? You people have something against girls with short hair? Every one of the models I saw had hair that would probably go down to midback when left loose. No shoulder length? No bobs? Bah! It's like someone's gone and said "Short hair is teh evil!! OMG! Noooo short hair!" Give me a break. I quite prefer my short hair, thank you very much. (I told you, love, you'll always lose this argument. Sorry.)
Two, height and bodies. Yes, here I have big issues. Why are all the fashion models tall and skinny as rakes? Show me the short, not so skinny women that will be the ones actually wearing these clothes! Show the curvy bodies. What do you do when 98% of the population isn't built like your little stick figures? And boobs. I want to see some chest cleavage here, people! Some of us have more than an A cup bosom. Granted, not all the girls on the walk are flat. But the clothes sure do give that impression at times, when the breastses aren't being squashed by strangely built tops. Or when the girls aren't wearing support, which can not possibly be all that comfortable. Maybe that's what the "itty bitty titty club" is for? And let's see some ass while we're at it. Sound good? I know the male population will think so. Won't you, boys?
Three, "The Walk". Why the weird movement?? You ladies look as though you're slamming your feet down with each step you take and that doesn't make much sense. Walk normal for God's sake! No wonder the clothes never look as good IRL as they do on the runway. This is not the Nazi regime, you don't have to goose step. Just a nice little sashay will do.
Four, make-up. Why must designers insist on making the nice model ladies look like their makeup has been done by ten year old boys? Just accentuate the natural beauty of these women. Most of them are gorgeous. Don't hide that, use it! True, some designers aren't as bad about this but I have seen some god awful makeup use on the runways. Yes, you should work with the colors of the cloth but please, for the sake of my sanity, do it with moderation!
Five, the male show. Every thing for the men looks bloody normal. WTF?!? Why don't you have to wear the funny clothes and the gaudy make up? Come on!! *grumble* Yes, I have seen some of you wearing shades of cloth like magenta, periwinkle and bright flaming orange, but that's about it. Revenge for the women! Let's see some fricking lipstick and nail polish! Electric purple eye shadow for the dude on the left! Yes!
Six. Why for the love of god do all the male designers act like flaming homos??? I have nothing against gay men. I rather like some of them. And the effeminate ones can be cute at times. But sweet mother of mercy, get a grip. You are fashion designers, that is all! You don't need to lisp or do the little hand flip unless you are actually batting for the home team. Thank you.
So that's my two bits on the fashion scene. Hope you enjoyed.
Quote of the day:
Fashion is a form of ugliness so intolerable that we have to alter it every six months.
Oscar Wilde
